This afternoon I'm driving up to Maine with my sister. I'm doing that thing again this year where I provide childcare for the Quakers on their spiritual retreat. This year's theme is stewardship and simplicity. It's a good thing I'm just going to be watching the kids because I'm pretty sure I would have nothing to offer to those topics. I'm a terrible steward and I don't live very simply. God, I'm a terrible Quaker! Anyways, I'm sort of nervous about the drive up. It's only three hours or something like that but the longest leg I've ever driven is an hour out into central Massachusetts for my riding lessons last fall, and even that felt like a lot. At least Rachel will be with me.
I can't believe the first week of April is in exactly two weeks.
My brother's girlfriend is an absolute idiot. I always told him he would be a magnet for airheads and bimbos but he was all like oh Eliza I think I have better judgement than that. Ummmm, NO. She's too peppy and over familiar with people, she hardly even greeted me when we met, and she's too skinny. Okay, I know that's not a valid reason for disliking somebody and maybe I'm a little jealous but there you have it. I can't wait for the end of the school year when they'll inevitably have to break up and go off to college.
Hmmmm.... I don't have a lot to write about today so I'm sort of just trying to come up with things to fill this post with.
In Dr. Gordon's office she has these catalogs called The Gurze 2011 Eating Disorders Resources Catalogue. Come to think of it, Marci has them all over her waiting too. Anyways, they're actually pretty cool. They're filled with books you can order, and tips for how to avoid bingeing and purgeing and stuff. Then at the back they list practically every single treatment center in the U.S. I was actually surprised to find out that there are only three credible centers in Massachusetts. McLean Hospital (the one that the institution in Girl, Interrupted was based off of), Laurel Hill Inn (the one I went to), and then CEDC (Cambridge Eating Disorders Center).
I binged yesterday and the day before :( The weird part is, I don't think it was because I'd restricted. The first binge on Wednesday was because I had to open the ice cream store at 10 a.m. and then stay all by myself until 6 p.m. It was raining and I was alone and there were no customers, and even though I had my little lunch or whatever, I just felt like I was going to be so bored and the only way to get through the day would be to binge eat. Then yesterday, I binged again, and not so much out of hunger as it was out of, I feel like eating a lot of ice cream. Also, Michelle was making herself a shake and it made me want a treat. Anywho, I had a big breakfast today so that I can be off on a good start to the weekend, and then I decided to take my meds also so maybe that will help. Hey, maybe I binged because I haven't been taking my meds! Hmmm. It's funny how things start to make sense when you think about them.