Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Sushi & time machines. Wish I had a time machine.

Just wrapped up a somewhat tedious but altogether wholesome evening with Amy. We ordered sushi and watched Hot Tub Time Machine. At the movie rental place she was like, "You will LOVE this movie I watched it a couple weeks ago and the whole time I could not stop thinking about how much you would LOVE this movie." I was like, great. I wanted to get Shutter Island but whatever. I felt uncomfortable disagreeing with her. Anyways, the movie was so bad I'm actually offended that she thought I would enjoy it. Now I'm wondering to myself, wow. She must think I am the most unsophisticated person in the world. I mean, I love ridiculous movies. I am the first one in the theater when a new Adam Sandler stinker comes out and I am always up for a mindless romantic comedy but Hot Tub Time Machine is just... subhuman. No offense to those of you who liked it.

The sushi was delectable though. I got these vegetarian rolls stuffed with tempura yams and mushrooms and seaweed, then wrapped in mango. It's a good thing we drove home with the food because if we had stuck around I'd have ordered like fifty of them.

Speaking of life on the food front, things are steady for the time being. I'm following the meal plan I was on in program... with a few tweaks here and there that I made. Basically I'm eating three meals and three snacks a day but leaving out five or six exchanges altogether. Dangerous, I know. It's only going to set me up for hunger and frustration, which will ultimately lead to unmanageable binge urges and blah blah blah but at this point I'm so fucking huge I could care less. I have a good thirty pounds to lose. Remember when I used to talk about only needing to drop eight? Ugh. Those were the days. As it stands, about twenty of the thirty pounds are from binges in the past several weeks, and the other ten is just the healthy weight I took back on from eating enough food when I was in treatment. So I guess if I'm being rational I really only need to lose twenty pounds. It's still a lot! And I hate waiting for it to come off! Luckily I'm not weighing myself. I refuse. No good will come of looking at those disastrous numbers because they will only smother my hope of ever being thin again.

Whew! Done with that. I'd like to change the subject so that this post doesn't end on such a sorrowful note. But what to write? Hmmm... have I mentioned how excited I am for my family to come home on Sunday!? I can't wait to see them! I also can't wait to relinquish the plant watering and hamster restoration duties. It will be nice to go back to being a guest in my house as opposed to a caretaker.


  1. I didn't like "The Hangover," if that makes ya feel any better.

  2. Ahaha me neither. Everyone else I know loved it.

  3. hey... omg.. i can totally relate to that having to lose more weight thing... like... i had to gain 20lbs in treatment... ended up gaining 26... soo... at this point im thinking i have to lose the weight i wanted to with ana.. PLUS the 26lbs.... which is totally unreasonable... but ive reached my GW with ana multiple times and they just kept getting lower and lower... u know as well as i do... u'll never be happy with what weight ur at when u obtain it with ED