Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?

Because she had bright students. Honk honk. I couldn't think of a title so I'm using the joke on a popsicle stick I found on the ground.

Exhausted. Once a week we take the kids to this fancy playground for the day and let them run around in the spray pool while we the supervising staff stand in the boiling sun and watch. I detest Tuesdays. But despite how much I want to just collapse into bed right now, I did agree to take on a babysitting gig from 4:30-10:00this evening. I just finished reading to Rosalind and River (let it be known that those are in fact their real names), they are tucked in for the night, and now I'm enjoying a diet coke whilst simultaneously blogging on a computer so ancient it still has the Kid Pix application.

Today I weighed myself which was careless because I made a commitment to not step on the scale for two weeks. It's not like if I give myself unlimited access to the numbers I'll weigh myself after every meal, but it does provoke even more negative body image which leads to sadness which then leads to ice cream which then inevitably leads to more weight gain. Fortunately I've lost a few pounds over the last two weeks. This doesn't mean much though considering the last time I weighed myself it was bingeapalooza... so the shedded pounds are mostly water and salt. I've made some calculations though and I have exactly 15 lbs. to lose in order to be skinny again. So let the race begin!

I'll try to see how much can be lost without a ton of restriction... I do love food and I've been following the meal plan ALMOST perfectly so it would be a shame to go and ruin all my hard work. Ugh, who knows? Maybe I'll binge tonight and all of this will be meaningless. Moot.


  1. Hahah I actually laughed at that joke. Is that pathetic or what?

    I'm confused as to why you are trying to lose weight. I also vowed not to weigh myself anymore, and I'm feeling much better about my body not knowing the exact number.

  2. Good question. Well I'm legitimately larger than I'm used to being- mainly due to incomprehensibly massive binges that have taken over the past 6 months of my life!! I would dearly love to be skinny like I used to be.

  3. I have a question, which I'm not sure you can answer, but if you weigh yourself and you are unhappy with the number, how come you (and not just you personally, many people) turn to food at the point? My mind would think bad number, must lose weight, don't eat.

  4. That is just a number. You are the size you are and that is allowed. You don't have to be "small". Why do you want to be small? Will you be happier? Or when you get small will ED tell you to get smaller?

  5. PTC- I know, the logic behind it makes no sense. The reason why I'll still binge even at a bad number is because it makes me feel better in the moment, whereas what would restriction do in the moment? There is no immediate gratification with restriction.

    David- You ask all the right questions :)